broken jetta key ring

I drive a 2002 Jetta, which has this super cool flippy key that has the power to unite all races under one banner.

This, how­ever, can­not be com­plete with­out a key ring. The chrome bar that comes attached really doesn’t do the job, and mine broke a while back. The folks at VWvor­tex forums were quick to pro­vide a DIY fix, which I’ve done my best to chronicle.

First, I tried super glue. That worked for a total of .0000333… sec­onds. Sec­ond, I tried JB Weld, which is sup­posed to hold together two chee­tas run­ning full speed in oppo­site direc­tions. This worked for about dou­ble that time. For the record, I do not chalk this up to the infe­ri­or­ity of these prod­ucts, but the idiocy by which this VW key ring was designed.

After these failed attempts, I ripped the key in half (which can lit­er­ally be done by just pulling the two halves apart, see below).

open Jetta key

I then pro­ceeded to VWvor­tex, and found exactly where the board inside was located, so I wouldn’t drill into it. What you want to do is drill in the cor­ner where the panic but­ton is, oppo­side side of the key. I used a 1/8 inch drill bit, which allowed a smaller key ring to fit through, albeit quite snugly.

drilling into the key

Viola! My key, as well as my man­hood, are now whole again. Reply below if you have questions.

finished key ring